Obsessive Love: Writing Mania in Fiction

The craft theme in The Inkwell this month is “Summer Love,” and we kicked off August with a craft guide to six different types of love in fiction, as identified by the ancient Greeks:

  1. Eros: Romantic Love

  2. Philia: Friendly Love

  3. Storge: Familiar Love

  4. Agape: Universal Love

  5. Ludus: Playful Love

  6. Pragma: Enduring Love

The Six Love Stories guide takes a close look at each type of love — and how to build each kind of relationship on the page.

But there are two Greek concepts of love that didn’t make it into the guide: Philautia (self-love) and Mania (obsessive love). I left self-love out because I wanted to focus, in the guide, on relationships between and among people, and I left out mania because there was actually a lot of conflicting discussion out there on whether it even counts as a Greek love concept or not. Still, it seems worth talking about.

So, each of those “leftover” concepts gets its own blog post this month. You’re reading about mania now, and you can read about philautia here.

While romantic love, friendship, and familial bonds often take center stage, there's a darker, more intense side of love that can drive characters to the edge—mania. Understanding and portraying this obsessive, consuming form of love can add tension, drama, and depth to your narratives.

What is Mania?

Mania, from the Greek term for "madness," represents an obsessive and possessive form of love—darker than the romantic love, friendship, and familiar bonds that we usually talk about when we talk about love. It is characterized by emotional extremes, irrational jealousy, and a desire to control or possess the object of one's affection. It can also involve codependence or the “need” for the object of one’s affection to “complete them.” Think of mania like too much eros and not enough philautia and/or ludus. The result can be destructive.

Note: When you think of mania, your mind might go straight to the world of fandom, where our intense admiration for celebrities leads us to do things that might be considered “crazy” on a benign level (making dozens of friendship bracelets to trade with fellow Swifties, screaming at the top of our lungs at Shay Stadium), or a darker and more possessive one (that open letter encouraging Swift to break up with Matty Healy, stalking, etc.). This blog post is going to focus more on mania in interpersonal relationships (as opposed to parasocial ones), but you’re absolutely on the right track!

Writing Mania

Mania provides a rich ground for conflict and tension, allowing you to explore the darker aspects of love and human psychology. It’s certainly not appropriate for every novel, but if there’s a place for mania in yours, it can be really fun to write. If your characters experience or are affected by obsessive love, you can take a deep dive into themes of control, dependency, and the consequences of unchecked emotions — not to mention the character growth that comes from disentangling oneself from that type of love.

Ride the Emotional Rollercoaster

In case it wasn’t clear already, manic love is toxic, and it’s often defined by extreme highs and lows, with a manic character boomeranging between euphoria when things are going well and despair when they feel slighted or rejected. Often, this kind of love also comes with irrational jealousy and suspicion (without cause). Explore what causes these highs and lows and how the character’s jealousy is triggered — and how these extremes affect their behavior and relationships (with both the object of affection and with others).

Show the Impact on Relationships

How does the object of the character’s mania respond to his behavior? Show the ways this obsessive love strains the — which perhaps throws the couple into negative spirals, eroding trust and creating emotional distance on both sides.

The destructive consequences of the control and possession that are foundational to mania affect more than just the romantic relationship. How does this love affect both parties’ relationships with friends, family, work, etc.?

Dig Into the Character’s Psychology

Every villain is the protagonist of his own story, and the most compelling ones are the ones we can relate to at some level. So, to avoid creating a two-dimensional or cartoonish character, delve into where this mania comes from? Is the obsessive behavior driven by deep-seated fears of abandonment? By self-hatred?

Are there moments where your character is aware of the unhealthy behavior and its negative impacts on the people he loves? If so, do those moments inspire efforts to change, or does he feel powerless?

Contrast Mania with Healthy Love

Often, the problems in a toxic situation become more obvious when contrasted against a healthy alternative. How do the other relationships in the book — the healthy ones characterized by pragma or ludus, and with a foundation of philautia — highlight the destructive aspects of mania?

Let the Relationship Evolve, for Better or Worse

Every relationship has to evolve — in fiction, that’s what gives readers something to root for — and one based on mania is no different. What does the emotional fallout of this obsessive love look like for the character experiencing it, the character on the receiving end, and others in their orbit? Is there a path to healing and recovery for the character, with or without his previous partner? (This may or may not be appropriate for your book — you decide!) If so, how will he learn to break this cycle and start building healthier relationships?

Writing Prompt

Write a scene where a character's mania reaches its peak. This could be an outburst of jealousy, an attempt to control their partner, or an emotional breakdown. Focus on the character's internal journey in this moment, as well as the impact of his actions on himself and others (and his awareness, or lack thereof, of that impact).

Does Mania Have a Place in Your Story?

Let me know in the comments! And, if you’d like to take deep dives into the other six Greek concepts of love, download Six Love Stories today!